The Little People in my Life

I absolutely adore the little ones in my life. I literally could sit all day and watch them play. There is something about their imagination, creativity and discovery.

Ava loves her brother! I mean the girl can't get enough of him. She acts like the big sister and helps him out, tells him it is ok when he falls and includes him in her ideas. She is so genuine and wants him to do well, succeed with new things and take care of him.

Jack just adores Ava. Everyday I pick him up from Chris and says, "we go get Ava?" He is really learning from her on how to treat others. I see the compassion from Ava showing up in Jack. He talks to babies in soft, sweet voices and when someone cries he is right there telling the person it will be ok. He even told me yesterday he loved his friends Tanner, Rory, and baby. He loves to go and play with them and tells me had fun with them. I love seeing him develop these relationships.

Potty time

Started potty training Jack today. I put him in big boy undies and he just rolled around on the floor and then started running around. He must have felt free! Ava has been a big help trying to get him in the bathroom and tells him what to do. He just can't seem to tell us he has to go so we had 3 accidents today. We'll get there, eventually,

A month of transitions

So we moved, yes it was a rough month, but I can finally say that things are somewhat returning to normal around here. I actually got the kids in their rooms before 9:00 tonight! 

Ava wants to go swimming every day so it has been difficult to keep her happy and to get things done around the house.  She hadn't kept up with her summer packet and our nightly reading has been absent. I feel like a horrible mom for not making time for it everyday. 

Jack took a bit longer to adjust to our new house. He proclaimed for the first week that he couldn't go to bed because he didn't know where his bed was! Now he plays in his room and loves being upstairs. He loves swimming, but mostly just jumping in! He is so much more verbal and his able to tell us everything. 

Ava and Jack have learned to play together well. Ava had shown Jack how to play a few games, like Hungry Hungry Hippos. He played it for an hour one night! They eat at the counter for every meal, hopefully they will join us at the table once again!

Pee everywhere!

So I have been trying to get Jack to sit on the potty, not even go, just sit. That's been a nightmare. He has no interest. Could care less about treats. I still ask every time I change his diaper. 

Today I was taking his swim diaper off in my parents guest bedroom. I asked him if he had to go potty and he said no like usual. But then there he was standing there and pee was going everywhere! I was kind of dumb founded and didn't know what to do. I don't think he did either. I just kept saying "No!" I even tried to catch it with my hand! What was I thinking??? I guess we have made a step in the right direction. Now he has actually seen himself pee! LOL!

A Great Day

Today had to be one of my favorite days as a mom! Ava had her last day of kindergarten. The morning started with the Kindy 500 where the kids ran part of the track with a cardboard car on. It was a lot of fun and camradarie. Next was a picnic lunch, just me and Ava on a blanket with the entire SMG school community surrounding us. It was relaxing, sunny, warm and just a wonderful feeling being out there in that environment. Jake and I surprised Ava with a vanilla shake when we picked her up from school. It was neat for both of us to be there and a very special treat for daddy to be there the last day at pickup. And she loved the milkshake! Enough that she would only give me one sip!

Such a milestone today. I can't believe we have a first grader! 

Ava with Lauren who is like a big sister to her!

Kindy Almost Through

So Ava is in her last weeks on kindergarten! This year just flew by and I can't believe how much she has grown! From reading words to sentences to entire books. From counting to adding to subtracting. From being scared to walk into the school building each day to hopping out of the car by herself and running in. I thank her teacher Mary Emily Noble for building her confidence and having her see that learning is fun and exciting! Now onto summer with the big move to our new house!

Mother's Day

What a wonderful day! I love my kiddos so much! Ava bought me a beautiful scarf and Jake bought me workout clothes and a new water bottle. But being with my kids is enough for me. I got to eat breakfast with Jack man. He talked with and sat on my lap. I sat with Ava while she ate too! We enjoyed the rest of the day with my mom, just hanging out and enjoying each other's company. I couldn't have asked for a more pleasant day with my family xoxo

I Like You

Jack has a new phrase...I like you. He doesn't say it to everyone, and I happen to be one of the lucky ones he does say it to. What a special little phrase coming from a rambunctious 2 year old. Lately, he likes to snuggle and sit with me. I wouldn't trade those moments for anything! 

Family Divided

So, Wisconsin is playing Kentucky in the Final Four. Ava is the only one who had this match up in her bracket this year. She thought that was pretty cool, so decided we need a party. She planned the whole shebang. We had decorations, red and blue plates, basketball napkins, and games. We played basketball on the play hoop and pin the w or k on the shirt! It was a fun night for all, thanks Ava!

Sibling Rivalry

Sibling rivalry has gone to a whole new level in our house these days! Jack has realized he has a mind of his own and that he can push Ava's buttons. It has pretty much become nonstop to the point where we have to separate them...geesh! A month ago we would get a few complaints from Ava about how Jack didn't cooperate, but now it's all about whose toy is whose and who had it first. Jack has resorted to kicking and hitting Ava. We told her it was coming. We knew Jack would get stronger and more determined and that time has come. BUT, then there are moments like this where there is that unconditional love, no grudges held! I hope they love, protect and fight for each other until the end!

Sick Babies Part 2

Ok, we are sick of being sick! Another week of strep, stomach aches, and fever. Ole man winter can leave and spring can come! We need fresh air, warm breezes, playing outside, and just getting out of this house! It's very hard watching your little ones not feel their best. I want my non-stop talking Ava back and my charismatic Jack.

Lost tooth

The tooth has been hanging by a thread for days! She keeps wiggling it and telling me stories of other kids who have wiggly teeth too. She keeps predicting the day it will finally come out. Well on March 21st at 8:20 pm it did. I told her to let me brush her teeth so I could get that tooth out once and for all, sure enough after about five swipes, there it was. So tiny and precious. Her first baby tooth fell out. Luckily I was prepared and had her tooth fairy pillow ready and waiting. I asked her how it felt and her reply was, "weird". Now she is sleeping soundly with this milestone complete. Jake said its weird being on this side. He feels like it was yesterday when he was a kid feeling anxious about the tooth fairy coming. Time flies! My baby Ava just lost her first tooth. A big day in the Brandau house!

Worst day of my life

I thought we would get through these years without it happening, but no. I got an email that said, "Ava's new haircut". I immediately thought, Ava didn't get a new haircut! But she did! She was using scissors at school and apparently thought she needed a trim. I had to giggle. Oh the stages of life. When I picked her up she claimed it was the worst day ever. We talked it through, no harsh words, no yelling. She made a bad choice and she knew it. Life will go on and her hair will grow again.

Sick Babies

There is nothing worse than having sick kiddos. For the last two weeks we have been fighting this stomach bug. I just feel so helpless because there is nothing I can do except provide hugs and kisses. Having work hang over me doesn't help either. I don't have a job where I can just call in sick. So the question arises what to do? This is when I wish I could just be a SAHM! All those worries would be gone and I could focus on my kiddos. I hope they understand because sometimes I don't. I love my kiddos more than anything, but for some reason when they are sick I just love them a little bit more.

Balance

How do you achieve balance? I feel like I'm a gymnast on a beam falling from side to side. Two kids, a husband, a full time job, and oh yeah myself too. Some days are better than others. Today not so much. Running late this morning because my two year old decided he wanted to stay in bed. Do you blame him? Get in the car and my trusty mini van is on E. Was supposed to fill up on the way home from karate last night...forgot. Well Jack and I made a side trip to Speedway and then it was bus after bus on my 30 minute commute. A day of work and I forgot about Family Math Night, I guess I will not be attending. Pick up Jack, did he get in trouble today, goodness yes. He even admitted it today. I guess that's a start. Next onto to get Ava...her nana fed her dinner, thanks mom! Karate uniform on and in the car to get to karate. Home and hubby made pancakes for dinner. Got a 2 1/2 mile run in before I am in for the night. I'm exhausted. I feel like I'm in a rat race. Now for those 8 hours of sleep I'm supposed to get...that will have to wait until the weekend.

My Other Love

Ava. She will always be my first born. My little girl. She started her life fighting for her life, hooked to a ventilator being fed through tubes. I cried. And cried more. I didn't want something so little to feel so much pain. It wasn't fair. But little Ava fought and is now a thriving 5 year old.

Jack wants me to hold his hand, but Ava wants me to wiggle her tooth, encourage her to read, talk with her about things bothering her, and still snuggle before bed. This year I've seen Ava grow. Not only grow physically, but mature. She is able to control her emotions more and more each day. 

I find it harder and harder to be her mother and not her friend. She is so compassionate and caring, what I want in a true friend. But I have to stand my ground with her. I want her to be strong minded, yet respectful. That's a very hard thing to teach. 

Yesterday, while eating breakfast I observed her curiosity and wonder. It was so delightful to see her mind at work. She had two juice boxes, one empty and one full. First I saw her connect the two straws and create one long straw to get the juice out. Then she went further. She put one of the straws in both of the juice boxes. She was then able to transfer the juice from the full container to the empty one. Problem solving at your best! A teacher's dream! 

As she sleeps next to me hugging her pillow pet, I'm so excited to see what is next for her. Yes, she is asleep in my bed and will be carried to her own bed. She tells me her room is too dark and noisy. Not a great routine to start, but it won't be forever :)

Sweetest Words

Why did I title my blog "Mommy, Hold My Hand, Please."?  I have been wanting to do this for a long time.  I'm frustrated.  Frustrated with role as a parent and mommy.  I want to do it all.  I want to be a stay at home mom.  I want to work.  I want to be super mommy.  I want to be the mom who makes homemade valentines for her kids to pass out and then volunteer at the party at school.  I want to make homemade dinners that are healthy every night for my family.  I want to do a superb job at work and be recognized for it.  I want to finish the laundry.  I want to clean my bathrooms more than once a week.  I want to actually dust every inch of my house.  But, sometimes I just get to hold my son's hand.  

He has started saying that a lot.  I mean every time we leave the house, get out of the car, walk to the kitchen.  It has hit home with me.  He just wants me to be connected to him.  He feels safe when I hold his hand because he is connected to his mommy.  It is a wonderful feeling.  I love hearing those words and feeling his little hand grab mine.  His 2 foot stature walking along side me makes me feel like I am his someone special.  Most of the time he is running around throwing his body onto anything soft he can find or trying to convince me he needs to watch "Sheriff Callie" on the ipad for the 20th time that day, but then he will just walk over to me and say "Mommy, hold my hand, please." When he was an infant he needed me to feed him, burp him, hold him, cuddle him.  Now he is two and his needs have changed.  

I love this little guy...and I just want to hold his hand.